Transforming People Pleasing
In case you missed it, last week I released my very first digital guide called The People Pleaser’s Guide To Reclaiming Your Personal Power!
You can grab a copy here.
I’m truly thrilled and grateful every time I see a purchase come through, because I know the guide just got into the hands of someone who physically and energetically said “I’m ready for a change.”
You may or may not relate to being a people pleaser, so I thought I’d break down who this guide is for…
It’s for the person who, across the board, finds it difficult to say NO to things that are asked of you.
You feel obligated to say Yes, but resent it.
You feel trapped in this obligation.
You feel guilty if you say NO so it never truly feels like an option.
All of which causes you to feel overlooked and taken advantage of.
It’s also for the person who only finds it difficult to say NO in certain situations or with certain people.
In most situations, you feel free to agree to what you want to agree to and to say NO to what you want to say No to, but there are still moments and people that you contract around.
This usually occurs when saying NO feels like it’s going to create confrontation either by them being mad at you or disappointed in you.
The feeling of someone being mad at you or disappointed in you causes too much unease in you to say how you truly feel about the request, so you agree to the request out of resentment and frustration (though you likely bottle that up inside and repress it, because expressing it creates confrontation, which is scary and uncomfortable).
In these instances, you lose your power to align with what you truly desire to align with, but you just sort of “deal with these moments” by taking on the frustration and resentment without doing anything to truly change the dynamic.
You’re not faced with an inability to say NO on a day-to-day basis, so it doesn’t feel like a “real issue” to deal with.
Your strategy has mainly been to avoid these situations and relationship dynamics, but they still pop up every so often.
And when they do occur, you just suck it up and deal with it until you get through it (and you probably vent about it to someone close to you). This isn’t very peaceful or powerful.
This guide can help you transform these moments, as well.
In this guide, I offer a range of solutions regarding reclaiming your personal power around your ability to agree to what you truly desire to agree to and to say NO to the things you desire to say NO to, where each solution is a progressive step towards reclaiming more peace and power.
Solution One may be all that you can get your energy behind today, but I share a full bridge of options so you can progressively get your energy behind solutions that reclaim more and more of your personal power.
If you’re someone who has an easier time saying NO, but are not yet solid in your ability to do it in every scenario, I share a solution that helps you reclaim more personal power.
And if you’re someone who says NO as a reaction against someone asking something of you, I show you how to say NO from a place of peace and power (versus a reaction against the request, which not necessarily coming from a place of peace and power).
I even offer the solution that an enlightened being lives so you understand the full scale of peace and power that’s possible.
My entire body of work is about increasing self-awareness around our unconscious patterns, so we live from greater and greater degrees of personal power, peace, love and joy.
This guide is written from this same intention.
We’re all somewhere on a spectrum between varying degrees of disempowerment and full empowerment (this is the process of awakening).
This guide addresses the full spectrum by offering a progressive range of solutions, depending on what you can currently get your energy behind.
Whether you’re new to understanding personal empowerment or have been at it awhile, this guide is designed to help you increase your self-awareness.
One of the main things I share in this guide is the process of inquiry I have been using for the past 13 years to understand any unconscious pattern in myself (I apply this process to scenarios related to people pleaser’s in this guide, but it’s the same process I use for any unconscious pattern in myself).
This guide lays the foundation for being able to see unconscious movements in yourself and understand them in an instant (once the foundation is known and understood).
It requires being able to understand your pattens from three very specific angles.
Once you know these three angles, you’ll be able to start recognizing, owning and transforming patterns in yourself, in a flash.
No more drowning in patterns for years, months, weeks, days…or even hours.
Knowing this is what allows me to constantly notice, understand and address any dissonance that shows up in my experience.
I don’t live buried under patterns that cause frustration, resentment, bitterness, anger, etc. because I know how to address what causes these feeling in my experience.
(Hint: blaming outwardly is never going to change your experience of the dynamic).
Otherwise you can grab your copy HERE!
Always Shine Brightly,
Shanna
P. S. Even if you’re not the one in the relationship who finds it difficult to say No, this is for you if you have a partner who finds it difficult to say No.
If you’re interested in creating a partnership with equal power, this guide will help you understand why they find it difficult to say No and how you can help them feel more powerful in being able to do so.
It’s easy to take advantage of someone who never says No and it’s easy to overlook how they feel inside (because they bottle it up and repress it), but if you want to create a strong relationship of equal power, understanding them through this guide is going to help you co-create a stronger relationship.
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